by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Public Transport: 5,158thLeast Corrupt Governments: 6,497thNudest: 10,455th
The Federal Republic of
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Population15.395 billion

Leaderthe Federal Council


The Federal Republic of Alpenburg is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by the Federal Council with a fair hand, and remarkable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, smutty television, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 15.395 billion Alpenburgers hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Public Transport, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bern. The average income tax rate is 44.1%.

The all-consuming Alpenburger economy, worth a remarkable 1,357 trillion francs a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 88,179 francs, with the richest citizens earning 5.3 times as much as the poorest.

Nobody draws smiley faces on receipts anymore, no one born in Alpenburg can fix a leaky faucet, feuilletons can only be deciphered with a Galliennais dictionary, and the nation's most "productive" diamond mine hasn't been operational for seven months. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Alpenburg's national animal is the eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Alpenburg is ranked 188,541st in the world and 11th in Gay Equality for Fattest Citizens, with 8.63 Obesity Rate.

Most Advanced Public Transport: 5,158thLeast Corrupt Governments: 6,497thNudest: 10,455thTop
Highest Economic Output: 13,285thSafest: 13,837thMost Inclusive: 14,077thLargest Populations: 15,989thLargest Publishing Industry: 16,247thBest Weather: 16,908thMost Compassionate Citizens: 17,654thMost Politically Free: 17,918thMost Beautiful Environments: 18,300thNicest Citizens: 19,324thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 20,166thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 20,644thMost Cultured: 21,120thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 21,365thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 21,993rdSmartest Citizens: 22,112thMost Developed: 23,392nd
Most Politically Free: 1st in the region

National Happenings

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