The Democratic Republic of Beazlend is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Tommy Wiseau with an even hand, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, complete lack of prisons, and vat-grown people. The compassionate, cheerful population of 15.669 billion Beazlendians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alfenheim. The average income tax rate is 98.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Beazlendian economy, worth a remarkable 3,637 trillion Zennis a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 232,154 Zennis, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation is illegal, the nation is automatically assumed to be the source of all unmarked weapons, proper policy proposals prerequire professional peer-reviewed papers, and politicians are battling inequality by declaring themselves better than everyone else. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Beazlend's national animal is the Flying turtle, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Atheism.

Beazlend is ranked 1,940^th in the world and 2^nd in The Atheist Empire for Most Valuable International Artwork, with 392.14 Bank.