by Max Barry

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Most Secular: 420thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 843rdLargest Publishing Industry: 1,206th
The Most Serene Eternal Republic of
Democratic Socialists Ordinary Caring Intelligent World Citizens
Hele mei hoohiwahiwa! Ho'olu komo la kaua!
Da Big Kahuna
Civil Rights
Very Good
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population22.665 billion

CapitalAstro City
LeaderDa Big Kahuna


The Most Serene Eternal Republic of Calistan is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Da Big Kahuna with an even hand, and notable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, soft-spoken computers, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, humorless population of 22.665 billion Caliwogs are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, although Healthcare, Environment, and Industry are also considered important, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Astro City. The average income tax rate is 70.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Cali economy, worth a remarkable 2,094 trillion Takoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, highly specialized black market in Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 92,400 Takoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Calling dibs is an unalienable right, replacement organs are grown in vats, the Treasury has been accused of flushing money down the toilet, and young and brooding teens are welcomed with open arms to the Dogwarts School of Strangeness and Sorcery. Crime is totally unknown. Calistan's national animal is the Kiwi, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Kahunaism.

Calistan is ranked 4,859th in the world and 146th in the South Pacific for Smartest Citizens, with 129.97 quips per hour.

Most Secular: 420thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 843rdLargest Publishing Industry: 1,206thMost Influential: 1,421stMost Valuable International Artwork: 1,536thTop
Highest Workforce Participation Rate: 3,947thMost Rebellious Youth: 4,090thMost Beautiful Environments: 4,673rdSmartest Citizens: 4,859thLargest Populations: 7,269thMost Cultured: 7,771stMost Compassionate Citizens: 8,136thHighest Food Quality: 9,021stHighest Economic Output: 9,146thHealthiest Citizens: 9,921stBest Weather: 10,257thMost Stationary: 10,293rdNicest Citizens: 11,789thMost Inclusive: 13,015thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 13,206thTop
Longest Average Lifespans: 13,426thMost Advanced Public Education: 13,471stMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 13,610thMost Scientifically Advanced: 13,807thLargest Black Market: 13,937thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 16,902ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 18,494thHighest Poor Incomes: 18,820thMost Income Equality: 19,462ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 21,949th
Most Secular: 20th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 31st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 53rd in the regionLargest Populations: 61st in the regionTop
Most Rebellious Youth: 110th in the regionMost Influential: 113th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 120th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 134th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 139th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 146th in the regionMost Stationary: 172nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 192nd in the regionLargest Black Market: 199th in the regionMost Cultured: 236th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 280th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 293rd in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 295th in the regionBest Weather: 320th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 380th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 387th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 413th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 424th in the regionNicest Citizens: 431st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 434th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 440th in the regionMost Inclusive: 469th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 517th in the regionTop
Largest Information Technology Sector: 548th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 563rd in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 587th in the regionMost Patriotic: 658th in the regionLargest Governments: 762nd in the regionMost Developed: 899th in the regionMost Income Equality: 904th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,026th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 201 » Aidenfieeld, Farengeto, Darakin, Kringalia, Sandaoguo, Hanguk-Nippon, Jehenna, The naked people, Tsunamy, Volaworand, Sedunn, Outer Utonixick Gollinican, The Solar System Scope, Ridehale, The Two Jerseys, Yellunstryer, Curlyhoward, Kiasu-ism, Cypheri, Nova Montron, Pax Dracon, Drystar, Theorin, Gymnostan, RestartAll, Walloonia, Madhonia, North Kanuckistan, Sanden, Nowa Europa, Ancient Slobovia, Noire Denholm, 073 039 109 032 080 111 112 112 121, Moreana, Center Lisle, Rebel-topia, Drugged Monkeys, Sthalrim, Soem, Centristvill, Bod Wareenaland, Beepee, Isokenzar, USNE2018, Abarri, Xandev, Auphelia, Land Without Shrimp, Wehraboos, Amerion, and 151 others.Mapico, Noveos, Bear Connors Paradiso, Bleakfoot, Corgitopiaa, PenguinPies, Bawkie, Fasire, Ebonhand, West Pastafaria, Ralphburg, Shefino, The Worst army of, Laamiva, Valdutz, Myness, Midand, Concrete Slab, Andinla, The SpaceNeo-Goryeo Etymological Society, Western Fardelshufflestein, Tepertopia, Phanama, Zaelith, Steviland, Doraya, Blondiesland, Treir, Holota, Truskawkoland, Pencil Sharpeners 2, Proctethia, NIGHTRAY, Noimosini, Westenhald, Herbert Island, New Qafedemar, Oxyliteral, Freedoom, Hong Kong Kowloon and New Territories, United States of Belvaria, Ragabania, Kaleidescooptopia, Beblahbleblo, Unojo, Moridine, Danily, Linguiniland, New Sanet, Kiani, Drew Durrnil, Indolos, Saciu, Damn Frigid Wastelands, Yaravia, Bohenia, CostaLisa, Uvalor, Malmsia, Photoplier, Arvan Irawer, New Plant, Aurcania, Andrendia, Immund, Cereskia 2, Ambirich, Piscantium, Arscanesia, The Imperial Of Notsep, The Akian Islands, GERMAN EMPIER, Raidener, The Island of Sorna, The Haughtherlands, Cucutenium, Achemar, Skaladoria, Kanatian Percocet, Ostavaria, Stephastan, The Woragopiria, Drvonia, Chernaya Zvezda, Banglazstrogaria, Eleuthelrium, Kantamaria, Makinius, Erstavik, Willing Mind, Ever Testing, Venezia Pacifica, Ipugao, Berusturg, Bonobiana, Brazilian impero2, The republic of Konsa, Esterwood, Monaque, Martiland, Leimarite Empire, Bavaristan, New American Dictatorship, Great Lothian, Froshar, Baron Ungern and Tzar Nicholas, Auviantan Outh Islands, Kremony, Blancemon, Cilibia, New Crownea, ARIAPOLIS01, Antwerpen1, Shoinkwishima, Shadeth, Goom Bay, LadyRebels, Driodal, Lile Ulie Islands, Taigama, Rhetiaa, Nouvel Empire, South Pacifican Kilendjj, Hydratonium, Al Madhaa, Dakalian, Farelonia, Sordandia, Evinea, Kurdislavic Algharbistan, MaPetiteFille, TescoPepsi, Altnavia, Los Rodeos, Marainta, East Papas Fritas, Numano, The Republic of Everleigh, Tyflugian, Conexia, Blucroix, Ardenswije, Superlols, Dirnenzeber, Luli Safari, BEEstreetz, Stoinia, Crudia, Brania State, Noutoshi, and Ugranda.