The Empire of Caprinia is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Fitzroy Delacroix with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 3.845 billion Caprinians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ville-Marie. The average income tax rate is 71.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Caprinian economy, worth 698 trillion Caprinian dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 181,584 Caprinian dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Politicians are often seen with soldiers pointing guns at their heads, no cul-de-sac or trailer park is complete without a gambling parlor, vats of anabolic steroids are being dumped into the ocean to make Caprinian mussels the biggest in Europeia, and creating cardboard imitations of missiles is a new top-secret military project. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Caprinia's national animal is the Lion, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Catholic Christianity.

Caprinia is ranked 91,574^th in the world and 282^nd in Europeia for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens, with 51 Whatever.