by Max Barry

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Most World Assembly Endorsements: 6,275thMost Influential: 10,554thMost Income Equality: 15,667th
The United Socialist States of
Iron Fist Socialists Equality and Tolerance Society
Strength Through Compliance
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

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Cellar doors

Population940 million


The United Socialist States of Cellar doors is a huge, orderly nation, remarkable for its state-planned economy, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical population of 940 million Cellar doorsians are ruled with an iron fist by the socialist government, which grants its people the freedom to do whatever they like so long as it doesn't involve getting richer than anybody else or challenging the government.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 66.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but sluggish Cellar doorsian economy, worth 27.3 trillion lire a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Cheese Exports, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 29,006 lire, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Women who display their ankles are shunned by society, parents who fail mandatory parenting classes risk having their children taken away, internet moderator is one of the most popular jobs among the nation's more socially awkward citizens, and music teachers are commonly seen busking in order to fund their music programs. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cellar doors's national animal is the parrot, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Cellar doors is ranked 53,505th in the world and 2,066th in The East Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 68.76 Law-abiding Acts Per Hour.

Most World Assembly Endorsements: 6,275thTop
Most Influential: 10,554thMost Income Equality: 15,667thMost Inclusive: 16,019thBest Weather: 19,388th
Most Inclusive: 490th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 514th in the regionMost Influential: 520th in the regionBest Weather: 592nd in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 715th in the regionMost Secular: 721st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 732nd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 747th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 767th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 814th in the regionNicest Citizens: 843rd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 862nd in the regionMost Income Equality: 872nd in the region

National Happenings

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