by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Public Transport: 8thLargest Black Market: 20thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 20th
The Armed Republic of
Psychotic Dictatorship Fascist Dictatorship
Dílis go Bás
Donn
Influence
Shoeshiner
Region
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Celtician

Population20.244 billion

CapitalTech Duinn
LeaderDonn
FaithThe Order of Donn

CurrencyOricalcum
AnimalWolf

The Armed Republic of Celtician is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Donn with an iron fist, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, zero percent divorce rate, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 20.244 billion Celts are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education, Industry, and Environment are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tech Duinn. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Celticianian economy, worth an astonishing 16,120 trillion Oricalcums a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 796,297 Oricalcums, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

Slavers view "what did your last slave die of" as a request for a demonstration, grinding bureaucracy has the international wheels of justice turning slowly, trespassers entering Donn's office are immediately vaporized, and every day has been a surprise since weather reporters turned to consulting ancient totems for their seven-day forecasts. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Celtician's national animal is the Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is The Order of Donn.

Celtician is ranked 5,426th in the world and 160th in Lazarus for Most Authoritarian, with 6,819.15 milliStalins.

Top
1%
Most Advanced Public Transport: 8thLargest Black Market: 20thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 20thLowest Crime Rates: 22ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 28thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 33rdHighest Average Incomes: 37thLargest Governments: 38thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 44thMost Corrupt Governments: 45thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 46thMost Subsidized Industry: 46thHighest Average Tax Rates: 50thHighest Poor Incomes: 51stMost Advanced Public Education: 55thHighest Economic Output: 128thLargest Information Technology Sector: 130thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 153rdLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 242ndSmartest Citizens: 254thMost Efficient Economies: 383rdMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 486thLargest Publishing Industry: 534thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 813thLargest Mining Sector: 1,044thMost Devout: 1,094thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,240thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,274thMost Cultured: 1,369thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2,081stTop
5%
Largest Welfare Programs: 2,384thMost Scientifically Advanced: 2,434thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2,699thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,810thMost Valuable International Artwork: 3,268thMost Authoritarian: 5,426thMost Stationary: 5,939thHealthiest Citizens: 6,310thLargest Populations: 6,364thLargest Agricultural Sector: 8,507thTop
10%
Most Influential: 11,745thMost Conservative: 12,118thMost Developed: 12,372ndMost Extreme: 19,658th
Top
1%
Largest Governments: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionLargest Black Market: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 2nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 3rd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 4th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 4th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 5th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 5th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 6th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 7th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 12th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 14th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 17th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 24th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 37th in the regionMost Devout: 55th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 57th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 60th in the regionMost Cultured: 67th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 75th in the regionTop
5%
Most Stationary: 98th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 101st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 110th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 113th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 123rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 153rd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 155th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 160th in the regionLargest Populations: 188th in the regionMost Extreme: 199th in the regionMost Influential: 272nd in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 362nd in the regionTop
10%
Largest Agricultural Sector: 428th in the regionMost Conservative: 473rd in the regionMost Developed: 718th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, every day has been a surprise since weather reporters turned to consulting ancient totems for their seven-day forecasts.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, trespassers entering Donn's office are immediately vaporized.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, grinding bureaucracy has the international wheels of justice turning slowly.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, slavers view "what did your last slave die of" as a request for a demonstration.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, citizens are barcoded to keep track of their movements.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, cutting-edge missile systems are being retrofitted to twin-prop air force biplanes.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, the new Really Big Telescope has been praised for presenting pictures of bright dots in unprecedented detail.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, the country has been 'going shopping' by annexing nearby nations for their resources.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, a small country is wondering where their capitol building's gold dome went.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, truancy officers have a hard time catching children trained in advanced camouflage skills.

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