by Max Barry

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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 5thLargest Insurance Industry: 6th
The Popsicle Pete Nation of
Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors
NONE OF YOU ARE SAFE!
Influence
Shoeshiner
Civil Rights
Outlawed
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Clench

Population32.892 billion

CapitalJoseph City
LeaderJoseph
FaithJosephism

Currencymoney
Animalviper

The Popsicle Pete Nation of Clench is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Joseph with an iron fist, and notable for its enslaved workforce, infamous sell-swords, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 32.892 billion follower of Josephs are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry and Healthcare are also considered important, while Social Policy and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Joseph City. The average income tax rate is 98.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Josephic economy, worth an astonishing 34,004 trillion monies a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 1,033,832 monies, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,084,452 per year while the poor average 177,163, a ratio of 23.1 to 1.

Careless Maxémon Trainers have been the cause of numerous search and rescue operations, takeaway food bought on the weekend now comes with fifty percent more sweat and tears, military pilots spend more time scraping feathers off their engines than flying their aircraft, and the nation's leader is normally just referred to as "snuggle-wuggle-huggy-bear". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Clench's national animal is the viper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Josephism.

Clench is ranked 24,937th in the world and 395th in the Rejected Realms for Most Extreme, scoring 36.01 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.

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1%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 5thLargest Insurance Industry: 6thLargest Black Market: 7thHighest Average Incomes: 9thLargest Mining Sector: 10thHighest Economic Output: 13thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 15thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 19thLargest Agricultural Sector: 21stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 21stLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 22ndLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 27thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 78thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 92ndMost Subsidized Industry: 136thMost Avoided: 138thMost Corrupt Governments: 147thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 148thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 174thLargest Governments: 179thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 184thMost Efficient Economies: 204thFattest Citizens: 297thLowest Crime Rates: 383rdMost Advanced Public Transport: 446thLargest Retail Industry: 759thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,009thLargest Populations: 1,714thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,729thHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,112thTop
5%
Highest Poor Incomes: 2,501stLargest Information Technology Sector: 4,606thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 5,181stRudest Citizens: 5,614thMost Stationary: 7,501stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 7,778thMost Devout: 7,809thMost Conservative: 8,049thTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 14,041stMost Advanced Public Education: 16,547thSmartest Citizens: 18,531stMost Authoritarian: 20,861stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 22,021stMost Influential: 22,532nd
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1%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 4th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 7th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 10th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 11th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 11th in the regionLargest Governments: 11th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 12th in the regionMost Avoided: 12th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 14th in the regionFattest Citizens: 20th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 20th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 33rd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 35th in the regionLargest Populations: 37th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 50th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 57th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 69th in the regionMost Stationary: 69th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Information Technology Sector: 112th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 122nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 149th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 265th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 266th in the regionMost Conservative: 267th in the regionMost Devout: 309th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 367th in the regionTop
10%
Most Extreme: 395th in the regionMost Influential: 410th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 461st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 489th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 511th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 674th in the regionMost Developed: 719th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 726th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Clench, the nation's leader is normally just referred to as "snuggle-wuggle-huggy-bear".
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, military pilots spend more time scraping feathers off their engines than flying their aircraft.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, takeaway food bought on the weekend now comes with fifty percent more sweat and tears.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, careless Maxémon Trainers have been the cause of numerous search and rescue operations.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, pandemics are over and done with by the time it takes to pass the nation's stringent border security.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, couch potatoes are considered to be model citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, tens of thousands of follower of Josephs rock the night away at the annual SuperLob.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, reddish-brown is the new black.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, people who have had childhood imaginary friends are told they can't ever be trusted with guns.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, a petition to improve Josephic literacy is mostly signed with cross-marks.

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