by Max Barry

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Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 3,012thHighest Crime Rates: 3,052ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,104th
The Provisional Government of
Compulsory Consumerist State Consumerist Wage Drones
Strive through hardship
Influence
Sprat
Civil Rights
Very Good
Economy
All-Consuming
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Coastal Straitlands

Population1.215 billion

CapitalNone
LeaderGuild of Elites

CurrencySterling Pound
AnimalSnake

The Provisional Government of Coastal Straitlands is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Guild of Elites with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, irreverence towards religion, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 1.215 billion Coastalists are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of None. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 6.7%.

The all-consuming Coastal Straitlandsian economy, worth 125 trillion Sterling Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an impressive 103,336 Sterling Pounds, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 616,560 per year while the poor average 7,904, a ratio of 78.0 to 1.

The Great Coastal Straitlandsian Desert is reputedly the most uninhabitable place in the region, crimes are difficult to stop as most of the police force is stuck in traffic, door-to-door salesmen are frequently beaten up by 'vigilantes', and school lessons are constantly interrupted by 'teacher needs a break' time. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Coastal Straitlands's national animal is the Snake, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Coastal Straitlands is ranked 4,934th in the world and 55th in Confederation of Corrupt Dictators for Largest Mining Sector, scoring 11,555.2 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.

Top
5%
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 3,012thHighest Crime Rates: 3,052ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,104thMost Avoided: 4,640thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4,924thLargest Mining Sector: 4,934thFattest Citizens: 6,063rdLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 6,303rdLargest Retail Industry: 6,896thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,026thMost Primitive: 7,156thMost Rebellious Youth: 7,412thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 8,948thMost Valuable International Artwork: 9,286thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10,232ndTop
10%
Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 11,662ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 11,712thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 14,104th
Top
5%
Most Rebellious Youth: 8th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 9th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 12th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 20th in the regionTop
10%
Most Primitive: 25th in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 27th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 27th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 30th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 31st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 34th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Coastal Straitlands was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Fattest Citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, school lessons are constantly interrupted by 'teacher needs a break' time.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, door-to-door salesmen are frequently beaten up by 'vigilantes'.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, crimes are difficult to stop as most of the police force is stuck in traffic.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, the Great Coastal Straitlandsian Desert is reputedly the most uninhabitable place in the region.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, nose plugs are the latest Coastal Straitlandsian fashion accessory.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, male tourists tend to be fearful of Coastal Straitlands's deadly femme fatales.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, toxic smog is dismissed as the populace just "letting off steam".
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, students are known to arrive at school in their pyjamas.
  • : Following new legislation in Coastal Straitlands, only the rich can afford the latest medical innovations.

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