by Max Barry

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Most Corrupt Governments: 1stMost Avoided: 1stLargest Mining Sector: 6th
The Exalted Supremacy of
Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors
Crush Their Spirits and You Will Control Their Minds
Influence
Truckler
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

East Borland

Population36.874 billion

CapitalThe Lair
LeaderHis Supreme Eminence
FaithOppression

CurrencySlave
AnimalGila Monster

The Exalted Supremacy of East Borland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by His Supreme Eminence with an iron fist, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, aversion to nipples, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 36.874 billion East Borlandists are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, although Law & Order and Industry are also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Lair. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient East Borlandian economy, worth an astonishing 32,644 trillion Slaves a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is a breathtaking 885,285 Slaves, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 6,247,427 per year while the poor average 42,282, a ratio of 147 to 1.

Many are questioning His Supreme Eminence wearing an Eckie-Ecola baseball cap during a keynote speech, birds and children's kites are regularly brought down by anti-aircraft fire, fur coats have become the latest fashion trend, and women who leak pus from infected wounds are told to suck it up. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. East Borland's national animal is the Gila Monster, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Oppression.

East Borland is ranked 6th in the world and 1st in The Alliance of Dictators for Largest Mining Sector, scoring 109,148.34 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.

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Most Corrupt Governments: 1stMost Avoided: 1stLargest Mining Sector: 6thMost Secular: 7thLargest Insurance Industry: 8thHighest Disposable Incomes: 9thFattest Citizens: 10thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 11thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 13thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 14thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 15thHighest Economic Output: 19thLargest Agricultural Sector: 20thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 21stHighest Average Incomes: 22ndLargest Retail Industry: 27thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 29thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 30thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 36thMost Ignorant Citizens: 50thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 51stMost Efficient Economies: 82ndRudest Citizens: 120thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 179thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 181stLargest Governments: 193rdLargest Soda Pop Sector: 255thLowest Crime Rates: 322ndMost Primitive: 414thMost Armed: 425thLargest Populations: 813thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,046thMost Stationary: 1,181stGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 1,445thLargest Black Market: 1,673rdTop
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Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 4,631stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 5,977thMost Influential: 7,692ndMost Subsidized Industry: 9,275thTop
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Most Conservative: 13,613thMost Valuable International Artwork: 18,052ndMost World Assembly Endorsements: 19,501st
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Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionTop
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Largest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Populations: 2nd in the regionMost Primitive: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionMost Stationary: 3rd in the regionMost Armed: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4th in the regionLargest Governments: 4th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 6th in the regionTop
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Lowest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 8th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 9th in the regionMost Influential: 11th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 11th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, women who leak pus from infected wounds are told to suck it up.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, fur coats have become the latest fashion trend.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, birds and children's kites are regularly brought down by anti-aircraft fire.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, many are questioning His Supreme Eminence wearing an Eckie-Ecola baseball cap during a keynote speech.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, both criminals and civilians are DOA.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, wood-framed catapults are ready to launch diseased corpses into besieged cities.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, the nation's entire cultural heritage is being auctioned off to the rich.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, mandatory spouse selection pairs elderly apparatchiki with stunningly beautiful supermodels.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, artists regularly face criminal charges and art-burning parties are common.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, His Supreme Eminence often plays real life games of Tower Defense against hordes of angry villagers.

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