by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,873rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 2,128thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,472nd
The Holy Riche of
Corrupt Dictatorship Well-Meaning Dictatorship
In tutela nostra Atlantis
the Elfqueens
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population3.57 billion

CapitalUmbworldheadstead Féerique
Leaderthe Elfqueens
FaithElvish paganism


The Holy Riche of Elfland is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by the Elfqueens with an iron fist, and remarkable for its otherworldly petting zoo, ubiquitous missile silos, and infamous sell-swords. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.57 billion Elves are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Umbworldheadstead Féerique. The average income tax rate is 93.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Elvish economy, worth 538 trillion elfmarks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 150,971 elfmarks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

New "Worker's Strike" laws set out who is allowed to strike a worker, it's considered a valid legal defence to say "a demon made me do it", posters remind people that 'Hoarding Mushrooms Is Theft', and it's best to decline if the Elfqueens offers to buy a round of drinks. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Elfland's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Elvish paganism.

Elfland is ranked 110,134th in the world and 14th in The United Islands of the Atlantic for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring 496.04 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.

Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,873rdTop
Largest Agricultural Sector: 2,128thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2,472ndMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,821stMost Corrupt Governments: 4,340thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 4,668thLargest Black Market: 4,945thNudest: 5,455thMost Devout: 5,567thHighest Average Tax Rates: 5,577thHighest Poor Incomes: 6,705thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,758thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 6,860thLowest Crime Rates: 7,301stLargest Governments: 8,029thMost Subsidized Industry: 8,869thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 9,760thMost Valuable International Artwork: 10,109thMost Advanced Public Education: 10,333rdTop
Largest Welfare Programs: 10,574thMost Beautiful Environments: 12,307thMost Authoritarian: 12,315thHighest Average Incomes: 13,213thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 16,199thMost Developed: 18,352ndLongest Average Lifespans: 18,688th
Largest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionTop
Largest Black Market: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Authoritarian: 2nd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 2nd in the regionNudest: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Extreme: 3rd in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3rd in the region

National Happenings

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