The Hidden Undergound Lair of Gnomewatchers is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Gnomad with an iron fist, and notable for its museums and concert halls, parental licensing program, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 25.393 billion Gnomes are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gnomeria. The average income tax rate is 83.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Gnomeian economy, worth a remarkable 2,410 trillion crowns a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 94,932 crowns, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

A fashion designer has been arrested for inciting hatred after claiming redheads couldn't pull off vermillion, selling your granddad's clothes requires an incredible amount of paperwork, banning party poppers has been a real party pooper, and warfare increasingly resembles a video game. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gnomewatchers's national animal is the garden gnome, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Gnomewatchers is ranked 6,808^th in the world and 373^rd in The North Pacific for Most Secular, with 97.33 Atheism Rate.