by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Public Transport: 5thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 9thMost Advanced Public Education: 22nd
The Socialist People's Democracy of
Corrupt Dictatorship Well-Meaning Dictatorship
Working Towards a Brighter Future!
Chairman Davit Purplinski
Influence
Superpower
WA Delegate / Armed Citizen of NK
Region
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Golanchia

Population19.765 billion

CapitalGolanchograd
LeaderChairman Davit Purplinski
FaithAtheism

CurrencyPurro
AnimalCat

The Socialist People's Democracy of Golanchia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Chairman Davit Purplinski with an iron fist, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, conspicuous electricity pylons, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, cynical, humorless population of 19.765 billion Golanchans are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Golanchograd. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Golanchian economy, worth a remarkable 9,837 trillion Purroes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Tourism. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 497,708 Purroes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Abortions are routinely performed in the nation's hospitals, airplanes have giant grilles on their noses to knock drones out of their path, Golanchian watches list strained wrists as a common side effect, and there are six more weeks of winter if a northerner sees her shadow. Crime is totally unknown. Golanchia's national animal is the Cat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Atheism.

Golanchia is ranked 236,498th in the world and 39th in North Korea for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -11.31 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most Advanced Public Transport: 5thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 9thMost Advanced Public Education: 22ndMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 35thMost Secular: 37thHighest Average Tax Rates: 53rdMost Advanced Defense Forces: 72ndLargest Governments: 73rdHighest Poor Incomes: 80thMost Beautiful Environments: 92ndMost Subsidized Industry: 112thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 114thSmartest Citizens: 160thMost Inclusive: 227thLowest Crime Rates: 247thMost Cultured: 281stLargest Black Market: 308thHighest Average Incomes: 328thMost Developed: 426thMost Corrupt Governments: 434thLongest Average Lifespans: 477thHighest Economic Output: 511thLargest Information Technology Sector: 815thBest Weather: 1,161stMost Compassionate Citizens: 1,379thMost Efficient Economies: 1,563rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,085thHealthiest Citizens: 2,306thMost Scientifically Advanced: 2,395thTop
5%
Largest Publishing Industry: 2,683rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3,177thNicest Citizens: 4,166thMost Influential: 4,180thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5,366thMost Stationary: 6,446thMost Rebellious Youth: 7,544thLargest Populations: 7,913thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 10,213thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 10,637thTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 13,114thMost Income Equality: 17,387th
Top
5%
Largest Black Market: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionSmartest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Stationary: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 2nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionMost Secular: 2nd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 2nd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 2nd in the regionMost Inclusive: 2nd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 2nd in the regionTop
10%
Largest Populations: 3rd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Influential: 3rd in the regionBest Weather: 3rd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 4th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 4th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Golanchia was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Scientifically Advanced.
  • : Following new legislation in Golanchia, there are six more weeks of winter if a northerner sees her shadow.
  • : Following new legislation in Golanchia, Golanchian watches list strained wrists as a common side effect.
  • : Following new legislation in Golanchia, airplanes have giant grilles on their noses to knock drones out of their path.
  • : Following new legislation in Golanchia, abortions are routinely performed in the nation's hospitals.
  • : Following new legislation in Golanchia, Chairman Davit Purplinski often plays real life games of Tower Defense against hordes of angry villagers.
  • : Golanchia voted against the World Assembly Resolution "Condemn Quebecshire".
  • : Golanchia voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Protecting Convicted Voters".
  • : Following new legislation in Golanchia, betting pennies on games of Go Fish is considered deviant.
  • : Following new legislation in Golanchia, hiding wrinkles with make-up is illegal.

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 5 » North American Communists, Ferasdor, Libertasnia, Marxist-Feminists, and Carrico.

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