The Department of Nord is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Patrick Kanner with an even hand, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, sprawling nuclear power plants, and daily referendums. The hard-nosed population of 16.515 billion Nordiques are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lille. The average income tax rate is 34.9%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Nordique economy, worth 658 trillion francs a year, is led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Door-to-door Insurance Sales, Arms Manufacturing, and Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 39,862 francs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Giggling teens are asked to put their mouths on rubber dolls, every day has been a surprise since weather reporters turned to consulting ancient totems for their seven-day forecasts, claiming to have performed the Heimlich Maneuver is a popular defense for assault charges, and the government violently suppresses separatist movements. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nord's national animal is the eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Nord is ranked 263,171^st in the world and 25^th in Department Store for Nudest, with 57 cheeks per square mile.