by Max Barry

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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 184thMost Ignorant Citizens: 302ndMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 364th
The Principality of
Father Knows Best State Suspiciously Conservative Democracy
North of the North Pacific
Influence
Minnow
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Northie

Population18.016 billion

CapitalNorth
LeaderNortherner
FaithNorthern Runes

CurrencyNortherner
AnimalNorthman

The Principality of Northie is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Northerner with an iron fist, and remarkable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, flagrant waste-dumping, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 18.016 billion Northies are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of North. The average income tax rate is 93.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Northiean economy, worth a remarkable 4,769 trillion Northerners a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 264,746 Northerners, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

Fraternities are notoriously exclusive, Members of Parliament operate under a PAYE scheme, Northiean soldiers are assured their new ray-guns will finally power up after the next round of ominous chanting, and pedants defending Northerner observe that psychopaths and sociopaths aren't exactly the same thing. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Northie's national animal is the Northman, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Northern Runes.

Northie is ranked 153,989th in the world and 2,717th in The North Pacific for Most Stationary, with 147.7484123854 days.

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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 184thMost Ignorant Citizens: 302ndMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 364thMost Subsidized Industry: 371stMost Primitive: 496thLargest Black Market: 618thMost Corrupt Governments: 668thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 699thFattest Citizens: 1,211thLargest Mining Sector: 1,848thMost Avoided: 2,486thMost Efficient Economies: 2,552ndLargest Retail Industry: 2,851stTop
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Highest Economic Output: 3,596thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3,862ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4,059thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 4,253rdHighest Average Incomes: 4,397thMost Secular: 4,669thRudest Citizens: 5,448thHighest Poor Incomes: 6,062ndLargest Governments: 6,659thHighest Average Tax Rates: 7,264thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 7,437thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 7,910thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 9,170thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 9,360thLargest Publishing Industry: 11,191stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 11,805thNudest: 13,260thMost Influential: 13,472ndTop
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Most Advanced Public Transport: 19,088thLargest Populations: 19,545thLowest Crime Rates: 27,185th
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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 8th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 11th in the regionMost Primitive: 12th in the regionLargest Black Market: 15th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 17th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 18th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 28th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 35th in the regionFattest Citizens: 37th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 38th in the regionMost Avoided: 58th in the regionTop
5%
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 95th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 111th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 113th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 121st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 131st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 145th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 160th in the regionMost Secular: 181st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 191st in the regionRudest Citizens: 194th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 195th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 240th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 272nd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 275th in the regionNudest: 280th in the regionLargest Governments: 310th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 325th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 326th in the regionLargest Populations: 336th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 527th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 625th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Northie, pedants defending Northerner observe that psychopaths and sociopaths aren't exactly the same thing.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, Northiean soldiers are assured their new ray-guns will finally power up after the next round of ominous chanting.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, Members of Parliament operate under a PAYE scheme.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, fraternities are notoriously exclusive.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, military pistols are more secure than the national treasury.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, more than one company makes the board game Monopoly.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, North is a police state during international summits.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, students do more community service than homework.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, tax assessment offices double as polling stations.
  • : Following new legislation in Northie, home education can sometimes be a load of bullocks.

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