The Purple flowers of Purple 5 is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The Purple with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, enslaved workforce, and disturbing lack of elderly people. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 10.816 billion Purple 5ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Flowerville. The average income tax rate is 79.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Purple 5ian economy, worth a remarkable 3,442 trillion Petals a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 318,294 Petals, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

Internet moderators work overtime to remove memes comparing The Purple to cartoon bears, it is popularly believed that "cheese every day keeps disaster away", Purple 5 Barrier Island residents anxiously await their 'Bridge to Somewhere', and students who refuse to pray are expelled from school. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Purple 5's national animal is the Honey bee, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Purple.

Purple 5 is ranked 8,436^th in the world and 11^th in Nerdlandia for Lowest Crime Rates, with 104.42 law-abiding acts per hour.