The Show about Nothing of Seinfeld is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Larry David with an iron fist, and renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, parental licensing program, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 20.69 billion Seinfeldians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New York City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 66.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Seinfeldian economy, worth a remarkable 2,739 trillion Vandalays a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Tourism, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 132,424 Vandalays, with the richest citizens earning 6.7 times as much as the poorest.

Seinfeldians believe a soft answer turneth away wrath but punitive punishment is much more fun, Larry David's luxurious new home has been designated as a protected cultural heritage site, the studies of art and philosophy are banned, and the official Seinfeldian Phrase Book weighs as much as a small child. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Seinfeld's national animal is the ring-tailed lemur, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Festivus.

Seinfeld is ranked 221,961^st in the world and 15^th in Seinfeld for Most Primitive, scoring -203.2 on the Scary Big Number Scale.