by Max Barry

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Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 6,305thMost Devout: 6,816thNudest: 7,052nd
The Free Lands of
Father Knows Best State Suspiciously Conservative Democracy
I feel bad for the screams
Freddy Fazbear
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population1.833 billion

CapitalFreddy Fazbears Pizza
LeaderFreddy Fazbear
FaithGolden Freddy


The Free Lands of Smidwest is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Freddy Fazbear with an iron fist, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, punitive income tax rates, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 1.833 billion Pizza peoples are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Freddy Fazbears Pizza. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 67.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Smidwestian economy, worth 224 trillion Coins a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 122,603 Coins, with the richest citizens earning 9.3 times as much as the poorest.

Foreign policy is based upon the principle of sieve and take, children are terrified that the 'flying police monster' will come to take them away in the night, wait staff claim to like it when odorous customers flirt with them, and the government has awarded itself a month-long holiday to celebrate its achievements. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Smidwest's national animal is the Bears, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Golden Freddy.

Smidwest is ranked 71,929th in the world and 50th in Institute of Cellulose for Highest Economic Output, with 224 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 6,305thMost Devout: 6,816thNudest: 7,052ndMost Armed: 8,674thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 8,860thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 9,138thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 10,307thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 11,017thMost Valuable International Artwork: 11,363rdTop
Most Subsidized Industry: 13,288thMost Efficient Economies: 13,289thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 13,706thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 14,321stMost Corrupt Governments: 14,618thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 15,474thMost Developed: 16,835thLowest Crime Rates: 19,709thBest Weather: 20,074thLargest Black Market: 20,626thHighest Average Incomes: 22,472nd
Nudest: 4th in the regionMost Devout: 8th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 9th in the regionTop
Best Weather: 10th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 14th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 17th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 17th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 17th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 18th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 19th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 6 » Boris Cult, MLGDogeland, Zarbik, Kingdom of Englands, Wechaiyae, and New Ryansville.

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