by Max Barry

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Highest Wealthy Incomes: 54thLargest Retail Industry: 64thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 110th
The Armed Republic of
Corporate Police State Halliburton
To rule and opress
Influence
Minnow
Civil Rights
Few
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Sprinkler

Population5.202 billion

CapitalPurgatory
LeaderAdolf Einstein

Currencyslave
Animalsubhuman

The Armed Republic of Sprinkler is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Adolf Einstein with an iron fist, and notable for its pith helmet sales, complete lack of prisons, and unlimited-speed roads. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 5.202 billion Sprinklerians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, pro-business, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Education also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Purgatory. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 56.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Sprinklerian economy, worth a remarkable 2,499 trillion slaves a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 480,565 slaves, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 4,467,980 per year while the poor average 4,746, a ratio of 941 to 1.

Newborns are being raised as mindless killing machines, the government is purchasing vast amounts of palm oil for plastics production, cleaners are very careful not to bump into the big red button on Adolf Einstein's desk, and the Counter-Terrorism Unit has been nicknamed "Big Bad Wolf" for its tendency towards urban demolition. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sprinkler's national animal is the subhuman, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Sprinkler is ranked 205,514th in the world and 7,599th in the South Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 2.12 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.

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Highest Wealthy Incomes: 54thLargest Retail Industry: 64thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 110thMost Corrupt Governments: 228thLargest Insurance Industry: 235thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 237thMost Avoided: 260thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 263rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 329thHighest Average Incomes: 353rdLargest Mining Sector: 449thFattest Citizens: 521stLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 555thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 618thMost Efficient Economies: 671stMost Scientifically Advanced: 799thRudest Citizens: 839thLargest Information Technology Sector: 852ndMost Armed: 952ndLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 998thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,002ndLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,036thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,139thLargest Black Market: 1,243rdMost Secular: 1,406thHighest Disposable Incomes: 1,531stMost Subsidized Industry: 1,863rdTop
5%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 2,313thLargest Governments: 2,399thSmartest Citizens: 2,652ndHighest Economic Output: 5,553rdLowest Crime Rates: 5,914thTop
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Most Advanced Public Education: 11,431stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 12,739thMost Pro-Market: 17,544thMost Stationary: 19,177th
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Largest Retail Industry: 4th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 4th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 4th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 7th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 10th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 10th in the regionMost Avoided: 10th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 12th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 14th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 14th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 17th in the regionFattest Citizens: 18th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 20th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 22nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 23rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 26th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 27th in the regionMost Armed: 28th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 30th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 38th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 40th in the regionRudest Citizens: 41st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 43rd in the regionMost Secular: 58th in the regionLargest Governments: 68th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 75th in the regionTop
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Smartest Citizens: 83rd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 102nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 102nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 174th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 331st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 354th in the regionMost Stationary: 368th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 407th in the regionLargest Populations: 524th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 666th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, the Counter-Terrorism Unit has been nicknamed "Big Bad Wolf" for its tendency towards urban demolition.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, cleaners are very careful not to bump into the big red button on Adolf Einstein's desk.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, the government is purchasing vast amounts of palm oil for plastics production.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, newborns are being raised as mindless killing machines.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, the latest Harry Potter book is a bestseller.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, visitors to the famed rainforests are instead taken to vast furniture factories.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, the hills are alive with the sound of ringtones.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, citizens must pay to enjoy Sprinkler's pristine beaches.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, students learn how to disarm mines before understanding basic arithmetic.
  • : Following new legislation in Sprinkler, maintaining economic growth is no laughing matter.

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