by Max Barry

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Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 81stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 145thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 235th
The Sawtooth Badlands of
Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors
Feed them to the grinding wheel!
Warchieftain Carolus Ironhorse
Influence
Nipper
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Nuke Control Cards

The Black Cathedral

Population4.428 billion

CapitalEphyra
LeaderWarchieftain Carolus Ironhorse
FaithBlackened Orthodoxy

CurrencyGallon
AnimalGormling

The Sawtooth Badlands of The Black Cathedral is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Warchieftain Carolus Ironhorse with an iron fist, and renowned for its enslaved workforce, public floggings, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.428 billion Sawteeth are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Law & Order, Spirituality, and Industry are also considered important, while International Aid and Social Policy are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ephyra. The average income tax rate is 95.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Sawtooth economy, worth a remarkable 1,786 trillion Gallons a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 403,420 Gallons, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.1 times as much as the poorest.

Sheep-like political loyalists repeat the mantra "one wheel bad, three wheels good", televangelists often claim they can cure your Lupus if you donate enough money, the country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, and constipated-looking politicians are uptight about potty mouths. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Black Cathedral's national animal is the Gormling, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Blackened Orthodoxy.

The Black Cathedral is ranked 1,812th in the world and 99th in The North Pacific for Highest Poor Incomes, with 187,995.06 Standard Monetary Units.

Top
1%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 81stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 145thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 235thMost Devout: 267thMost Corrupt Governments: 519thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 520thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 544thLargest Mining Sector: 598thHighest Average Incomes: 725thMost Armed: 759thLargest Agricultural Sector: 900thLargest Black Market: 925thMost Avoided: 1,213thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,402ndHighest Poor Incomes: 1,812thLargest Insurance Industry: 2,133rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,187thTop
5%
Largest Governments: 2,488thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,946thLowest Crime Rates: 2,956thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3,075thFattest Citizens: 3,091stMost Valuable International Artwork: 3,430thMost Subsidized Industry: 4,102ndHighest Average Tax Rates: 4,369thMost Efficient Economies: 4,828thRudest Citizens: 7,717thHighest Economic Output: 8,753rdMost Conservative: 9,258thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 10,242ndTop
10%
Most Authoritarian: 13,568thLargest Retail Industry: 14,352ndMost Advanced Public Education: 15,427thMost Developed: 16,002ndMost Influential: 16,174thMost Advanced Public Transport: 17,240th
Top
1%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 8th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 9th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 12th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 13th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 16th in the regionMost Devout: 18th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 23rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 25th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 26th in the regionMost Armed: 30th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 38th in the regionLargest Black Market: 41st in the regionMost Avoided: 44th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 62nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 68th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 81st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 84th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 99th in the regionFattest Citizens: 101st in the regionTop
5%
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 123rd in the regionLargest Governments: 125th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 149th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 213th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 239th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 261st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 270th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 341st in the regionRudest Citizens: 383rd in the regionMost Conservative: 509th in the regionTop
10%
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 551st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 667th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 721st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 776th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 813th in the regionMost Developed: 886th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, constipated-looking politicians are uptight about potty mouths.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, the country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, televangelists often claim they can cure your Lupus if you donate enough money.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, sheep-like political loyalists repeat the mantra "one wheel bad, three wheels good".
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, workers tend to schedule naps during all-hands meetings.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, The Black Cathedral is increasingly belligerent on the international stage.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, children who can't memorize their multiplication tables are sent to the mines.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, tax evaders are regularly visited by agents of the The Black Cathedral Blood Tithe.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, kindergartners love the free balloons that their schools give them.
  • : Following new legislation in The Black Cathedral, 13-year-old internet trolls are treated as a threat on par with terrorists.

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