by Max Barry

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Most Devout: 586thMost Valuable International Artwork: 1,148thMost Efficient Economies: 2,170th
The Holy Dolorian Imperium of
Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors
Honorem Deo, patriae, et Imperatoris.
Dux-Imperatorem John W Blackheart
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Nuke Control Cards

The Traditional States

Population5.121 billion

LeaderDux-Imperatorem John W Blackheart
FaithDolorian Chiefolicism


The Holy Dolorian Imperium of The Traditional States is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Dux-Imperatorem John W Blackheart with an iron fist, and notable for its avant-garde cinema, triple-decker prams, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 5.121 billion Dolorians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sant'Augusto. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 92.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Dolorian economy, worth a remarkable 1,052 trillion Imperiuses a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 205,556 Imperiuses, with the richest citizens earning 5.6 times as much as the poorest.

Childish pranks are no laughing matter, EULAs remind customers that "Private Mode" is a browser setting rather than a promise, children who can't memorize their multiplication tables are sent to the mines, and petitions to the government are being used to insulate politicians' office walls. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Traditional States's national animal is the Griffin, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Dolorian Chiefolicism.

The Traditional States is ranked 16,831st in the world and 70th in New Western Empire for Highest Poor Incomes, with 80,563.63 Standard Monetary Units.

Most Devout: 586thMost Valuable International Artwork: 1,148thMost Efficient Economies: 2,170thTop
Most Armed: 2,920thLargest Agricultural Sector: 3,286thMost Cultured: 3,301stLowest Crime Rates: 3,440thMost Subsidized Industry: 3,679thMost Corrupt Governments: 4,318thLargest Governments: 4,399thLargest Retail Industry: 5,328thMost Developed: 5,349thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 5,365thHealthiest Citizens: 5,646thLongest Average Lifespans: 5,655thHighest Average Incomes: 5,812thHighest Average Tax Rates: 6,255thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 6,291stMost Scientifically Advanced: 6,340thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 6,364thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,382ndMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 6,610thLargest Information Technology Sector: 7,229thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 7,423rdSmartest Citizens: 8,058thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 8,194thMost Advanced Public Transport: 8,927thMost Advanced Public Education: 10,208thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 10,729thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 10,759thTop
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 11,389thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 11,810thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 12,761stMost Conservative: 14,401stLargest Publishing Industry: 14,815thHighest Economic Output: 16,187thHighest Poor Incomes: 16,831stMost Beautiful Environments: 17,346th
Most Devout: 1st in the regionTop
Most Valuable International Artwork: 3rd in the regionMost Cultured: 8th in the regionMost Armed: 10th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 11th in the regionTop
Largest Agricultural Sector: 12th in the regionLargest Governments: 12th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 13th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 14th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 15th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 15th in the regionMost Conservative: 15th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 17th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 17th in the regionMost Developed: 17th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 18th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 18th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 18th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 20th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 20th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 22nd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 22nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 23rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


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