by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 3rdHighest Poor Incomes: 4thLowest Crime Rates: 4th
The Military Dictatorship of
Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors
Ignorance is Bliss
Influence
Duckspeaker
Region
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Tzuland

Population17.058 billion

CapitalFort Tzuland
LeaderGeneral Tzu
FaithTzuism

CurrencyGold
AnimalGolden Pig

The Military Dictatorship of Tzuland is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by General Tzu with an iron fist, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, deadly medical pandemics, and vat-grown people. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 17.058 billion Tzulandians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fort Tzuland. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Tzulandian economy, worth an astonishing 18,749 trillion Golds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 1,099,182 Golds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

Epidemiologists happily announce that the reported incidence of depression is close to zero percent, the police are tightening their grip on alcohol smugglers, high-tech infantry rifles automatically reload when the soldier shoots outside the screen of their helmet HUD, and 'Police Academy 36' and 'Sharknados On A Plane' are vying for top spot at the box-office. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tzuland's national animal is the Golden Pig, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Tzuism.

Tzuland is ranked 152nd in the world and 1st in Yggdrasil for Most Avoided, scoring 3,293.86 on the Kardashian Reflex Score.

Top
1%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 3rdHighest Poor Incomes: 4thLowest Crime Rates: 4thHighest Average Incomes: 5thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 8thMost Scientifically Advanced: 11thMost Subsidized Industry: 14thMost Efficient Economies: 16thLargest Black Market: 17thLargest Governments: 17thMost Corrupt Governments: 18thLargest Mining Sector: 22ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 23rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 26thLargest Insurance Industry: 26thLargest Information Technology Sector: 31stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 36thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 49thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 52ndHighest Economic Output: 87thHighest Average Tax Rates: 111thLargest Retail Industry: 147thMost Avoided: 152ndMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 164thMost Secular: 169thLargest Agricultural Sector: 199thSafest: 211thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 362ndSmartest Citizens: 471stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 634thMost Developed: 711thMost Advanced Public Transport: 761stHighest Wealthy Incomes: 811thLargest Gambling Industry: 825thLongest Average Lifespans: 834thMost Advanced Public Education: 834thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 894thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 912thMost Valuable International Artwork: 948thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 982ndFattest Citizens: 1,540thRudest Citizens: 1,572ndMost Influential: 1,594thTop
5%
Largest Populations: 8,257thTop
10%
Most Conservative: 14,119thMost Authoritarian: 14,640thMost Stationary: 15,515thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 17,104th
Top
1%
Largest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2nd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 2nd in the regionSafest: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 5th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 5th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 6th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 6th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 7th in the regionFattest Citizens: 7th in the regionRudest Citizens: 7th in the regionTop
10%
Most Conservative: 9th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 9th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 9th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 9th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 9th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 13th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 13th in the regionMost Developed: 13th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, 'Police Academy 36' and 'Sharknados On A Plane' are vying for top spot at the box-office.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, high-tech infantry rifles automatically reload when the soldier shoots outside the screen of their helmet HUD.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, the police are tightening their grip on alcohol smugglers.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, epidemiologists happily announce that the reported incidence of depression is close to zero percent.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, RPG fans reminisce fondly about when people thought they were evil and dangerous rather than geeky and socially inept.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, the nation has always been at war with Moltovea.
  • : Tzuland resigned from the World Assembly.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, minefields are being deployed along the border to discourage potential emigrants from trying to leave.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, people think "siege mentality" is a positive trait.
  • : Following new legislation in Tzuland, most of the nation's wealthy aristocrats are dentists.

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