The Military Dictatorship of Tzuland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by General Tzu with an iron fist, and renowned for its national health service, punitive income tax rates, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 17.773 billion Tzulandians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fort Tzuland. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Tzulandian economy, worth an astonishing 19,995 trillion Golds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 1,125,038 Golds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

Religious bigotry and a fear of outsiders have replaced religious studies in schools, Eau de Trashcan has become a wildly popular perfume, sermons are regularly interrupted by businessmen taking phone calls, and several citizens have complained about scientists abducting their pets for experimentation. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tzuland's national animal is the Golden Pig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Tzuism.

Tzuland is ranked 183,805^th in the world and 107^th in Yggdrasil for Most Politically Free, scoring 12.71 on the Diebold Election Inking Scale.