The Watchfires of UMS-1 is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its digital currency, ubiquitous missile silos, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 23.743 billion UMS-1ians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 15.9%.

The very strong UMS-1ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,863 trillion $$s a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 78,477 $$s, with the richest citizens earning 5.1 times as much as the poorest.

Blind dates reemerge as a necessary evil in the quest for love, laborers are building walls and making Wezeltonia pay for it, the treehouse in ^-^ Park is the tallest building in UMS-1, and town welcome signs list corporate sponsors. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. UMS-1's national animal is the ^-^, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

UMS-1 is ranked 84,138^th in the world and 1^st in United Monarchist States for Lowest Crime Rates, with 67.98 law-abiding acts per hour.