The United States of Union of soviet captlists is a huge, efficient nation, notable for its enforced nudity, suspicion of poets, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-working, democratic population of 258 million Union of soviet captlistsians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The relatively small, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 9.9%.

The thriving Union of soviet captlistsian economy, worth 14.0 trillion Rupllors a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Uranium Mining, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is 54,410 Rupllors, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 330,228 per year while the poor average 3,990, a ratio of 82.7 to 1.

Hundreds of thousands of convicts work as slaves in Union of soviet captlists's many privately-owned prisons, Leader's office has a newly installed Max-Man arcade game programmed by a 5th-grader, the tinfoil-hat crowd also recommend tinfoil wallets, and orange is the new black for judicial robes. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Union of soviet captlists's national animal is the Bengali Tigers, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Union of soviet captlists is ranked 25,939^th in the world and 29^th in Thaecia for Largest Mining Sector, scoring 6,263.57 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.