The Prinzessin der Ozelote of Xoriet is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Kath Zandion Beralis with an iron fist, and notable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, digital currency, and infamous sell-swords. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 17.541 billion Xoriens are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Androssi. The average income tax rate is 98.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Xorien economy, worth a remarkable 4,904 trillion Saruns a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 279,590 Saruns, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Collisions between bicycles and carnival floats are on the rise, employers are finding it hard to screen candidates now that everyone gets A grades in their exams, acupuncture is routinely prescribed for intravenous drug addicts, and members of the government all have oddly similar anecdotes about their childhoods. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Xoriet's national animal is the Golden Ocelot, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Fate's Mandate.

Xoriet is ranked 7,538^th in the world and 167^th in the Pacific for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 2,187.36 on the Clooney Contribution Index.