by Max Barry

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Most Primitive: 217thMost Ignorant Citizens: 481stMost Devout: 853rd
The Kingdom of
Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors
For the Glory of Kek!
King Gregolas The Parched
Influence
Hatchling
Civil Rights
Few
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Rare

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Ye Olde Kek Kingdom

Population1.658 billion

CapitalKekstantinople
LeaderKing Gregolas The Parched
FaithKult of Kek

CurrencyKekel
AnimalPepe

The Kingdom of Ye Olde Kek Kingdom is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by King Gregolas The Parched with an iron fist, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, public floggings, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 1.658 billion Kek Kingdomers are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kekstantinople. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 51.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Ye Olde Kek Kingdomian economy, worth 233 trillion Kekels a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, Uranium Mining, and Gambling. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 140,888 Kekels, with the richest citizens earning 9.0 times as much as the poorest.

Spaceports are more prevalent than computer ports, citizens wishing to be parents must undertake a series of gruelling tests to evaluate their capabilities, a division of tanks navigating "as the crow flies" has driven into a ravine, and the government is cracking down on subversive groups. Crime is a problem, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Ye Olde Kek Kingdom's national animal is the Pepe, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Kult of Kek.

Ye Olde Kek Kingdom is ranked 59,644th in the world and 3,480th in The North Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 50.99 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.

Top
1%
Most Primitive: 217thMost Ignorant Citizens: 481stMost Devout: 853rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,179thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,388thTop
5%
Fattest Citizens: 3,247thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3,848thLargest Mining Sector: 4,042ndMost Corrupt Governments: 4,160thLargest Gambling Industry: 4,543rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 4,878thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 5,798thLargest Black Market: 7,051stMost Cultured: 7,773rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 7,943rdMost Armed: 10,005thTop
10%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 10,398thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 10,620thHighest Average Incomes: 15,606thHighest Disposable Incomes: 16,380thMost Valuable International Artwork: 17,337th
Top
1%
Most Primitive: 11th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 23rd in the regionMost Devout: 35th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 46th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 51st in the regionTop
5%
Fattest Citizens: 108th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 129th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 144th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 174th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 185th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 218th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 237th in the regionLargest Black Market: 280th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 305th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 362nd in the regionMost Armed: 372nd in the regionMost Cultured: 401st in the regionTop
10%
Largest Cheese Export Sector: 473rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 747th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 763rd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 842nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 875th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, the government is cracking down on subversive groups.
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, a division of tanks navigating "as the crow flies" has driven into a ravine.
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, citizens wishing to be parents must undertake a series of gruelling tests to evaluate their capabilities.
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, spaceports are more prevalent than computer ports.
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, it is typical to be greeted by a string of curse words in Ye Olde Kek Kingdomian restaurants.
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, the national anthem is a rather effective sleeping aid.
  • : Ye Olde Kek Kingdom published "Elite Kataphracts?" (Account: Military).
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, the government is seen to favor traditionalist religions.
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, citizens are regularly arrested in queues for 'loitering'.
  • : Following new legislation in Ye Olde Kek Kingdom, record sales of 'child-whacking sticks' have been reported.

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