The Dictatorship of Zipties is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Zen with an even hand, and renowned for its aversion to nipples, frequent executions, and complete lack of prisons. The compassionate, hard-working population of 1.179 billion Zippies have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sloth Town. The average income tax rate is 70.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Zippy economy, worth 108 trillion dollars a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Basket Weaving, and Automobile Manufacturing. Average income is 91,711 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Prankster scientists legally change their names to silly pseudonyms before major discoveries, historical commemorations regularly devolve into militaristic jingoism, not showing enough enthusiasm for mutual assured destruction is a court-martial offence, and condos feature wall-mounted cages containing endangered animals. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Zipties's national animal is the seal, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Sinisium.

Zipties is ranked 162,623^rd in the world and 6,151^st in The North Pacific for Largest Mining Sector, scoring 134.07 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.