by Max Barry

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Trading Cards

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0.46 Crushing Our Balls's trades...

ULTRA-RARE CARDS

Psychotic Dictatorship
“Honorius II, Gratia Dei, Imperator Sanctus”
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 149th Most Devout: 646th Most Ignorant Citizens: 930th
7.087 billion Marlborosteinians. Parental licensing program, triple-decker prams, and suspicion of poets.
Anarchy
“E Pluribus Unum”
Most Extreme: 177th Most Extensive Civil Rights: 1,188th Highest Drug Use: 1,213th
5.822 billion Guard 108ians. Absence of drug laws and spontaneously combusting cars.
SEASON ONE

RARE CARDS

Father Knows Best State
“Unknown”
Most Stationary: 7,354th Largest Black Market: 14,368th
9.205 billion Unknownians. Punitive income tax rates.
SEASON ONE
Iron Fist Consumerists
“For Science!”
Most Corrupt Governments: 861st Largest Retail Industry: 949th Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 952nd
4.985 billion subjects. Enslaved workforce, flagrant waste-dumping, and unlimited-speed roads.
Left-wing Utopia
“We're telling you the future of your planet is at stake”
Most Income Equality: 5,579th Most Devout: 13,290th
6.19 billion Benevolents. Complete lack of prisons, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare.
SEASON ONE

UNCOMMON CARDS

Capitalist Paradise
“A Fronte Praecipitium A Tergo Lupi”
Most Pro-Market: 2,175th Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 2,750th Largest Insurance Industry: 2,778th
19.575 billion Monte Cristoans. Sprawling nuclear power plants, anti-smoking policies, and strictly enforced bedtime.
Liberal Democratic Socialists
“This Big Mouth won't Bite.”
Most Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,521st Least Corrupt Governments: 2,627th Best Weather: 2,989th
7.054 billion Taga-Oslobs. Keen interest in outer space, restrictive gun laws, and devotion to social welfare.
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“I'm Loving It”
Largest Black Market: 1,861st Most Corrupt Governments: 2,872nd Largest Information Technology Sector: 3,325th
6.627 billion Customers. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, flagrant waste-dumping, and anti-smoking policies.
Liberal Democratic Socialists
“Listen to all Bobs Symphonies and enjoy them... or else”
144 million Bobs Symphonyians. Compulsory military service.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Compulsory Consumerist State
“Technology is our Galaxy's Future”
487 million Tech Var Province Founderians. Compulsory military service, irreverence towards religion, and complete absence of social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation

COMMON CARDS

New York Times Democracy
“Armada Paraguaya”
Largest Gambling Industry: 10,791st Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 13,626th Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 16,009th
8.72 billion Paraguayans. Compulsory military service.
SEASON ONE
Left-Leaning College State
“The Recombinant DNA and Genetic Research Leader”
Largest Welfare Programs: 10,609th Most Advanced Public Transport: 10,633rd Most Stationary: 13,353rd
8.424 billion H-Fers. Museums and concert halls, avant-garde cinema, and devotion to social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Democratic Socialists
“Eat, Work, Sleep, repeat”
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 1,676th Most Secular: 12,009th Highest Poor Incomes: 13,209th
3.084 billion Whoycorians. Complete lack of prisons, free-roaming dinosaurs, and pith helmet sales.
SEASON ONE
Moralistic Democracy
“Be developed”
Largest Mining Sector: 5,965th Healthiest Citizens: 7,353rd Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 7,454th
2.493 billion Ajay Dalalians. Free-roaming dinosaurs, sprawling nuclear power plants, and zero percent divorce rate.
SEASON ONE
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“No one is too young to join the military ”
1.397 billion TyphoonLexians. Multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, smutty television, and ubiquitous missile silos.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“Twirling Toward Freedom”
849 million Famtortipenlans. Ubiquitous missile silos, rampant corporate plagiarism, and compulsory military service.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“What a long strange trip it's been”
1.484 billion Dead Headsians. Soft-spoken computers, smutty television, and suspicion of poets.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
“I don't want that to be our motto.”
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 7,187th Most Influential: 13,591st
2.195 billion Lavender Xians. Pith helmet sales, ban on automobiles, and irreverence towards religion.
SEASON ONE
Psychotic Dictatorship
“Pau que nasce torto, nunca se endireita”
1.22 billion Dilmagradoans. Frequent executions, enslaved workforce, and irreverence towards religion.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Capitalist Paradise
“Justice, Piety, Loyalty”
Class
876 million I Carpe Diemians. Compulsory vegetarianism, ubiquitous missile silos, and lack of airports.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Corrupt Dictatorship
“Ave Dio”
498 million Khamdenians. Zero percent divorce rate, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Psychotic Dictatorship
“Hail the Establishment! /N/”
410 million Qizzans. Irreverence towards religion, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Corporate Bordello
“Squawk! Polly want a cracker!”
259 million Pirate Dunesians. Barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and irreverence towards religion.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Civil Rights Lovefest
“Strength Through Freedom”
269 million Cromwelliasians. Compulsory military service and irreverence towards religion.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Capitalist Paradise
“Anyone can make a difference”
319 million Rubans. Smutty television, irreverence towards religion, and spontaneously combusting cars.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Civil Rights Lovefest
“By The People For The People”
486 million Inlycliqueeans. Museums and concert halls, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and compulsory vegetarianism.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
New York Times Democracy
“We will endure above all else.”
471 million Volichtmesians. Ubiquitous missile silos, compulsory military service, and state-planned economy.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Corrupt Dictatorship
“N/A”
87 million Genosha in Libertatemians. Irreverence towards religion, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Father Knows Best State
“Death is A Version of Life”
677 million Kim Kardashian Koreans. Compulsory military service, punitive income tax rates, and complete absence of social welfare.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
Iron Fist Consumerists
“Together till the End”
106 million Cellians. Compulsory military service and restrictive gun laws.
SEASON ONE
Ex-Nation
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