SNN Issue 7

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Deerfenland, Takota, Qat, and Sekona Team up in Military Operation

(Freetown, Deerfenland) - The Afro Caribbean Republic is authorized by the Native Usonean Isles tribes of Qat, Abyt, and Sekona to go on a search mission for Queen Victoria of Crown Isles. It has been day since the former leader of the Siberian Federal Republic was caught in Puczovska and was sent to work on the Puczovskan Labor Front in their labor camps.

President Rump ordered the immediate call to action right after the approval was given. Queen Victoria was hated by the Africans in Deerfenland and now they are ready to show their true hatred for Queen Victoria and her people.

A kill-on-sight order was put in place for when the unit of soldiers sees the collapsed nation’s leader. They have the permission to shoot at her if they see her.

The Qat and Sekona Tribes and the Takota Tribe of South Osea agreed to help the Africans in this mission. “Queen Victoria caused a lot of problems in our world. She is a threat and needs to be taken out,” said Chief Rowdy of the Takotan Tribe.

President Rump has named her a “threat to Strangerealite kind,” and has called her a “dangerous woman”.

President Rump has done many things to improve the military of Deerfenland and to keep the country protected including arming the borders, sending soldiers to aid allies in foreign conflicts, and even launching missions against dangerous leaders of terrorist groups like El-Hendi and now sending a unit to hunt down a dangerous queen.

More as this Story Develops

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Ivan Dreshev Convicted for Document Falsification

(GORKASSK, PUCZOVSKA) – After a few days of deliberation, Ivan Dreshev was convicted today for his heinous crime of falsification of documents. Dreshev was arrested a few days prior after a raid by the Puczovskan Commissariat of Intelligence on his apartment.

Dreshev is known as the former leader of the Siberian Federal Republic. He was in Puczovska for political asylum after being overthrown from power. His arrest happened shortly after going into a hospital in Gorkassk in hopes of having a job, coinciding with the Commisariat of Income having reports of him falsifying reports of his work for him to obtain his property allowance from the state in return of lesser work.

The Puczovskan authorities assured the public, however, that Dreshev will be punished. The sentence that was handled down this morning was 10 years of hard labor to the state for his infraction of state policy.

The original Puczovskan News Story said this on the issue, "A few days ago, the Commissariat of Intelligence (Комісаріат Вівіаду) of Puczovska performed a raid on Ivan Dreshev's apartment in Gorkassk. He was the former ruler of the Siberian Federal Republic, and was in political asylum in Puczovska after being overthrown from power. The Commissariat of Income (Комісаріат Дочодов) recently brought to attention that he has been falsifying reports of his work so he can get his property allowance from the state for less work. He has been doing this for years, and he has been enjoying his nice apartment as his fellow labourers worked to exhaustion. Rest assured, he will be punished by his sentence this morning to 10 years hard labour for this severe infraction of state policy."

More as this Story Develops

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Elemis Polaris Airways Launches First Flight

(Magicality City, TNP) - Elmis Polaris Airlines made its first flight from the magical city the other day, and passengers were thrilled. A cellphone video captured the moment that the plane left the ground, along with many passengers cheering happily. The aircraft was bound for Arirang, and made it there in good time despite the turbulence that occurred. Long time pilot Daniel Danielson said, "You listen here, buddy. Hehe, I assure you that NO, aircraft ever in my life or any flight in my life has felt both that long and that... tranquil. You guys know if they got any food around here, I'm starving..."

One of the passengers on the aircraft, Jean Davis remembers the flight with a certain happiness.

"When your up that high, all the problems down below.... seem to just dissapear. All the war, all the hate and violence seem to just... poof."

The reactions of the consumers might have been substituted by what was later found as a narcotics issue. It seems that a passenger who has not been disclosed decided to smoke some pot while in the bathroom. Little did he know aircraft vents connect, which ended up getting the whole cabin and cockpit high. A landmark occasion for everyone it would seem.

Suspicions about the flight crew being high were heightened after a shaky landing was preformed, which almost lead to the wreck in if the aircraft. In any case the flyer was identified by the name of Ronald DeMilo. He has been apprehended and will stand trial for endangering a international flight. Whacky tobacy seems to also cause Whacky flights, wouldn't you say?

More as this Story Develops

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