Earlier Today, our brave troops managed to capture Toronto from the filthy globalists. President Donald Trump III said that "Trudeau knows as much as me that our great nation is going to win and take back Canada from the far-left liberals who almost turned Canada into Canadastan. We the Patriotic American Capitalists are going to take Canada Back!"
The military has announced that they expect to get to Ottawa by 7 PM tonight.
The cultural-Marxist UN has declared that our country is the "greatest threat to human rights", which is a secret code to mean "we don't like that someone is standing up to our satanic degenarcy and our plan to turn the world gay."