The Most Advanced Defense Forces in Doll Guldur
Nations ranked highly spend the most on national defense, and are most secure against foreign aggression.
 | Nation | WA Category | Motto | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. |  The Red Hot Sizzler of Sexy Santa | Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors | “Red Hot Sandra” | |
| 2. |  The Boozer of Sozzled Santa | Psychotic Dictatorship Fascist Dictatorship | “Cheers!” | |
| 3. |  The Dynamite Sticks of Cyclical Saboteur | Psychotic Dictatorship Fascist Dictatorship | “Mind the Mine, it's Mine!” | |
| 4. |  The Poor Peasants of Pinkest Panther | Moralistic Democracy Narrow-Minded Backwoodsy Bigots | “Pink is the New Black” | |
| 5. |  The Holy Riders of Stone of Caliburn | Psychotic Dictatorship Fascist Dictatorship | “Disinherited Brains” | |
| 6. |  The Unholy Terrors of Captain Bones | Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors | “ARRH!” | |
| 7. |  The Sentient of Silent Snorer | Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors | “He Who Laughs Last Laughs Longest” | |
| 8. |  The Pirate Queen of Ching Shih Shuishou | Democratic Socialists Ordinary Caring Intelligent World Citizens | “Sail the Seven Seas” | |
| 9. |  The Constitutional Crabery of Captain Krabs | Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors | “Walking Sideways” | |
| 10. |  The Theocracy of Redemptoria | Capitalist Paradise Corporate Slave State | “God's Will” |
