The Most Primitive in The Atheist Empire
Nations were ranked by World Census officials based on the number of natural phenomena attributed to the unknowable will of animal-based spirit gods.
 | Nation | WA Category | Motto | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. |  The Rather Unusual Madhouse of Barbarian Europe | Corporate Police State Halliburton | “Im in ur base killin ur d00dz” | |
| 2. |  The Holy Empire of Pasta Pharia | Corrupt Dictatorship Well-Meaning Dictatorship | “He boiled for your sins!” | |
| 3. |  The Most Serene Republic of Faithless | Civil Rights Lovefest Brave Progressives | “No faith here...” | |
| 4. |  The Second Chance of RU-486 | Democratic Socialists Ordinary Caring Intelligent World Citizens | “Take two and don't call me in the morning.” | |
| 5. |  The Land of Precious Metals and of Silverbugs | Civil Rights Lovefest Brave Progressives | “I used to never finish anything, but now I” | |
| 6. |  The Island of Haleistin | New York Times Democracy Corporate-Dominated Sham Democracy | “My own mind is my own church.” | |
| 7. |  The Oppressed Peoples of Slimweener | Psychotic Dictatorship Fascist Dictatorship | “Some men just want to watch the world burn.” | |
| 8. |  The Corporate Territory of SaederKrupp | Father Knows Best State Suspiciously Conservative Democracy | “Oh please, do deal with a Dragon” | |
| 9. |  The Consumerist Zombie Horde of Gargolia | Inoffensive Centrist Democracy Fascists | “Be happy in your work. Dismissed!” | |
| 10. |  The Pastafarian Dudeism of Free secular Humanists | Democratic Socialists Ordinary Caring Intelligent World Citizens | “Think, before you believe!” |
