by Max Barry

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The South Pacific World Census

The Most Scientifically Advanced in the South Pacific

World Census researchers quantified national scientific advancement by quizzing random citizens about quantum chromodynamics, space-time curvature and stem cell rejuvenation therapies. Responses based on Star Trek were discarded.

As a region, the South Pacific is ranked 8,114th in the world for Most Scientifically Advanced.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The PS2 Puppet of HeliosphereAuthoritarian Democracy Mouth-Breathing Creationists“Stop reading my motto!”
2.The Free Land of PrivatoreInoffensive Centrist Democracy Fascists“Desperate, but not helpless.”
3.The Serene Democracy of Bear Connors ParadisoInoffensive Centrist Democracy Fascists“What is love? Baby dont hurt me, dont hurt me, no more.”
4.The PANDA of Pencil Sharpeners 2Inoffensive Centrist Democracy Fascists“Stop reading my motto!”
5.The Holy Filesharing Empire of CeidtopiaCapitalist Paradise Corporate Slave State“No work no worries.”
6.The Hive of DelthorensdaleLeft-Leaning College State Paradise“Facilitate.”
7.The Technocracy of The Clockwork RepublicDemocratic Socialists Ordinary Caring Intelligent World Citizens“The Way Forward”
8.The Kingdom of Outer Utonixick GollinicanDemocratic Socialists Ordinary Caring Intelligent World Citizens“Whatever, I do what I want”
9.The Space Pirate Empire of New BriantownInoffensive Centrist Democracy Fascists“Twirling Toward Freedom”
10.The Republic of Kiasu-ismDemocratic Socialists Ordinary Caring Intelligent World Citizens“Kiasi, Kiabor, and most importantly... Kiasu!”
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