The Confederacy of JEAN JACKET RUSSELL HIGH SCHOOL is a huge, safe nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service, unlimited-speed roads, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 356 million Jean Jacks are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The enormous, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of EVERY BURGER IS A KING. The average income tax rate is 70.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The JEAN JACKET RUSSELL HIGH SCHOOLian economy, worth 14.9 trillion Sly Fellows a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 41,754 Sly Fellows, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Shoppers have literally had their hands full since plastic bags were banned, balaclava manufacturers are held criminally culpable for bank heists, the army's use of chemical weapons leaves a bad taste in the mouth, and the nation's most "productive" diamond mine hasn't been operational for seven months. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. JEAN JACKET RUSSELL HIGH SCHOOL's national animal is the Mercurial Baron von Smite, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

JEAN JACKET RUSSELL HIGH SCHOOL is ranked 281,126^th in the world and 568^th in A Taco Paradise for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -10.88 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.