The Democratic Republic of Kurwar is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Santello with an iron fist, and notable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, ubiquitous missile silos, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 1.343 billion Kurwarians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gozra. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 67.2%.

The powerhouse Kurwarian economy, worth 131 trillion Mylls a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, Information Technology, and Tourism. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 97,740 Mylls, with the richest citizens earning 8.6 times as much as the poorest.

People reciting Shakespeare have become a common sight, nobility is the world's oldest profession, Santello has been self-declared as the Most Supreme Magnificent Overlord of Everything You Ever Saw, and Santello is the self-declared God of all Kurwar. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kurwar's national animal is the Rat.

Kurwar is ranked 162,038^th in the world and 45^th in Eastern Europe for Most Primitive, scoring -60.55 on the Scary Big Number Scale.