The Republic of Gildenshtuck is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Oliver Blue with an even hand, and notable for its national health service, ban on automobiles, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, devout population of 4.729 billion Gildenshtuckians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Amora. The average income tax rate is 85.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Gildenshtuckian economy, worth 785 trillion gildens a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 166,143 gildens, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Gossip magazines have pictures of Oliver Blue sunbathing on the beach with political rivals, the 'sing-a-long with Oliver Blue' album is a popular souvenir, the new Liquor Legitimacy Office is besieged with job applications from people who have experience in "statistical sampling methods", and modelling agencies send their clients to work in nursing homes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gildenshtuck's national animal is the falcon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Freedom Christianity.

Gildenshtuck is ranked 277,433^rd in the world and 6,059^th in The North Pacific for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -9.72 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.