The God-Empire of Carstenia is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Carstenus with an even hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, national health service, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate population of 2.734 billion Carstenians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social and economic equality; they tend to view other countries as corrupted by the hollow pageantry of sham elections.

The large government prioritizes Education, with Social Policy, Healthcare, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Carstenville. The average income tax rate is 70.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Carstenian economy, worth 315 trillion Bolls a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 115,498 Bolls, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Army doctors who come under attack defend themselves by using stethoscopes like nunchaku, foreign spirits are hard to find due to an abundance of "Cletus and Jim Bob's Homemade Carstenian Moonshine", the nation is famous for bravely sending wave after wave of its soldiers until the enemy runs out of bullets, and any body part that can be cut off a person is no longer considered to be their property. Crime is totally unknown. Carstenia's national animal is the Sea-Hamster, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Carstenianism.

Carstenia is ranked 15,909^th in the world and 5^th in Rosaria for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 3,889.32 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.