The United Socialist States of Catoeni is a huge, genial nation, remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, state-planned economy, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, cynical population of 713 million Catoenians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Agrenium. The average income tax rate is 75.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Catoenian economy, worth 58.8 trillion Mices a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Retail. Average income is 82,400 Mices, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Members of the government all have oddly similar anecdotes about their childhoods, quiet professionalism has returned to the nation's armed forces, only adults may purchase violent video games, and the nation's diplomatic missives are now delivered via sniper rifle. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Catoeni's national animal is the Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Catoeni is ranked 86,977^th in the world and 33^rd in Aeternas for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 2,490.49 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.