by Max Barry

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Most Armed: 4,915thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 5,075thLowest Crime Rates: 5,830th
The Paranoid Mind of
Iron Fist Consumerists Imperialist Pig Dog Oppressors
Everyone share the burn barrel now
Influence
Minnow
Region
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Crazy Old Hobo

Population5.816 billion

CurrencyHobo Nickel
AnimalWill Work For Food Sign

The Paranoid Mind of Crazy Old Hobo is a mammoth, efficient nation, notable for its ritual sacrifices, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 5.816 billion Crazy Old Hoboans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 93.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Crazy Old Hoboan economy, worth a remarkable 1,048 trillion Hobo Nickels a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an impressive 180,324 Hobo Nickels, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 561,101 per year while the poor average 44,557, a ratio of 12.6 to 1.

The sun now sets on the Crazy Old Hoboan Empire, a bill to outlaw math homework has been submitted, adulthood begins with the creation of an email account, and the big red machine has ground to a halt. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crazy Old Hobo's national animal is the Will Work For Food Sign, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Crazy Old Hobo is ranked 156,048th in the world and 5,872nd in Balder for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 390.81 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.

Top
5%
Most Armed: 4,915thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 5,075thLowest Crime Rates: 5,830thLargest Governments: 6,272ndHighest Average Tax Rates: 6,546thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 6,641stMost Patriotic: 6,738thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 9,173rdHealthiest Citizens: 9,293rdMost Efficient Economies: 9,623rdMost Devout: 10,243rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 10,612thLargest Agricultural Sector: 10,650thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 11,016thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 11,908thMost Scientifically Advanced: 12,151stMost Subsidized Industry: 12,217thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 12,359thMost Advanced Public Education: 13,218thSmartest Citizens: 14,051stMost Advanced Public Transport: 14,715thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 14,992ndHighest Average Incomes: 15,045thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 15,338thTop
10%
Most Corrupt Governments: 17,663rdMost World Assembly Endorsements: 18,524thLargest Information Technology Sector: 18,770thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 19,090thHighest Food Quality: 22,254thMost Accessible: 23,517thMost Conservative: 25,755thMost Inclusive: 28,038thMost Beautiful Environments: 28,183rdBest Weather: 28,250thMost Developed: 30,471st
Top
1%
Most Patriotic: 111th in the regionTop
5%
Most Armed: 149th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 197th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 231st in the regionMost Devout: 284th in the regionLargest Governments: 309th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 314th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 325th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 343rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 344th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 359th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 360th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 394th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 398th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 403rd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 530th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 534th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 542nd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 574th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 580th in the regionTop
10%
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 639th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 646th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 680th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 689th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 717th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 766th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 910th in the regionMost Conservative: 1,097th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,152nd in the regionMost Accessible: 1,156th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 1,190th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Crazy Old Hobo was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Cheese Export Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Old Hobo, the big red machine has ground to a halt.
  • : Crazy Old Hobo was reclassified from "Psychotic Dictatorship" to "Iron Fist Consumerists".
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Old Hobo, adulthood begins with the creation of an email account.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Old Hobo, a bill to outlaw math homework has been submitted.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Old Hobo, the sun now sets on the Crazy Old Hoboan Empire.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Old Hobo, six-year-old children playing dress-up are viewed with suspicion.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Old Hobo, virtual assistants are seen with increasing suspicion every time they get an upgrade.
  • : Following new legislation in Crazy Old Hobo, unemployed mercenaries drift the country looking for new careers.
  • : Crazy Old Hobo was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Conservative.

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