The Commonwealth of Football Lads Alliance is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Nigel Farage with an even hand, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, public floggings, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, devout population of 12.299 billion Football Lads Allianceans are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 62.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Football Lads Alliancean economy, worth a remarkable 2,205 trillion pounds a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 179,337 pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Government theft from poor artists to give to rich allies has been dubbed the "reverse Robin Hood" policy, foreign lack of enthusiasm for Football Lads Alliancean nose-flute disco metal is seen as a reasonable casus belli, hordes of unemployed lumberjacks have resorted to cutting down utility poles to satisfy their cravings, and executions often take hours as amateurs attempt to find veins. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Football Lads Alliance's national animal is the eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Football Lads Alliance is ranked 19,248^th in the world and 14^th in The Kingdom of Great Britain for Most Corrupt Governments, with 103.31 kickbacks per hour.