The Emirate of Osirian Dispatch Office is a huge, orderly nation, notable for its burgeoning scarab population. The cynical population of 963 million Osirian Dispatch Officeans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Welfare. The average income tax rate is 28.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient Osirian Dispatch Officean economy, worth 35.0 trillion scarabs a year, is led by the Door-to-door Insurance Sales industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Retail, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 36,321 scarabs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Hostage-takers offer loyalty scheme points for prompt payment, it is illegal to make racist remarks in public, surveillance cameras are banned, and Harry Potter books are banned. Crime is relatively low, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Osirian Dispatch Office's national animal is the scarab.

Osirian Dispatch Office is ranked 217,198^th in the world and 4^th in fluffy bunny for Most Cultured, scoring 64 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.