The Kaisereisch of The Gula is a mammoth, socially progressive nation, ruled by Kaiser Amir Le-Evans with an iron fist, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, free-roaming dinosaurs, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 8.107 billion Gulens are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education, Law & Order, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Shefholden. The average income tax rate is 84.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Gulenisee economy, worth a remarkable 1,243 trillion Rounds a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 153,398 Rounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

MANTIS-SHRIMP-9000 was recently crowned the chess-boxing champion of The Gula, East Lebatuckese luxury goods are plundered by the working class of The Gula, the nation's space program is doxxing the planet, and Shefholden has restaurants serving every meat from aardvark to zebra. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Gula's national animal is the Brown Dolen Hawk, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is The Church of the Forsaken Demiurge.

The Gula is ranked 152,254^th in the world and 1^st in Bastion for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 446.72 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.