The Most Serene Republic of Bertaeyn is a huge, cultured nation, renowned for its irreverence towards religion, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 213 million Bertaeynians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Education, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 61.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but sluggish Bertaeynian economy, worth 5.97 trillion Balkabits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Basket Weaving, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 28,023 Balkabits, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Parents dread their examinations more than their children, 4-year-olds are often found reminiscing about the 'good old days', the question "please would you...?" is usually laden with passive aggression, and supervisors in Bertaeyn commonly tie bells on their necks to alert employees of their presence. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bertaeyn's national animal is the Black Cat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Bertaeyn is ranked 26,122^nd in the world and 684^th in the South Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 52.91 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.