The Holy Empire of Tustinkistan is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, smutty television, and punitive income tax rates. The democratic population of 13.792 billion Tustinkistanians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Besançon. The average income tax rate is 84.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Tustinkistanian economy, worth a remarkable 1,588 trillion Holy dollors a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 115,194 Holy dollors, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Burgers often list "miscellaneous meats" in their ingredients, truth is often impossible to tell from fiction on the evening news, films are funded in accordance with the volume of tears shed when reading the screenplay, and Little League matches are often attended by riot police with water cannon... just in case. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tustinkistan's national animal is the Guinea Pig, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Tustinkistan is ranked 33,621^st in the world and 1^st in Lorraine for Nicest Citizens, with 18.34 average smiles per day.