The United Socialists Republics of Ulborg is a titanic, orderly nation, ruled by Supreme Commissioner Tanya Nurlanovna with an iron fist, and notable for its anti-smoking policies, frequent executions, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 12.887 billion Ulberians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order is also considered important, while International Aid isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Qazaran. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient ulberian economy, worth a remarkable 7,781 trillion axnis a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 603,796 axnis, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Families returning from international vacations are unable to get their children back into the country, the national guard is mobilized whenever a mother gets separated from her child at the mall, colonial citizens are forced to sing the praise of the "Great Ulberian Liberator", and disadvantaged neighbourhoods have become no-go areas after sundown. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ulborg's national animal is the leopard, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is State atheism.

Ulborg is ranked 308,155^th in the world and 29^th in Calme Ybovien for Most Cultured, scoring -373 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.