The Republic of Vara 9 is a colossal, orderly nation, notable for its feral children, absence of drug laws, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.151 billion Vara 9ians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Defense, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 73.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Vara 9ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,227 trillion Object Permanences a year, is fairly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 171,684 Object Permanences, with the richest citizens earning 8.6 times as much as the poorest.

Smog in Vara 9 City is so bad that fresh air bottles are sold by street vendors, one can walk from one side of Vara 9 City to the other without setting foot on Vara 9ian soil, one can wake up in Vara 9 and have breakfast in Bigtopia, and citizens are required to report any and all incidents of prayer to their local Religious Affairs Officer. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Vara 9's national animal is the Question Mark, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Vara 9 is ranked 232,850^th in the world and 466^th in Eye for Highest Food Quality, scoring 9.02 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.