The Free Market Empire of Zerni is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Emperor Mishami with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ban on automobiles, and lack of airports. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 35.587 billion Zernians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The tiny, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Zerni City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Zernian economy, worth an astonishing 15,639 trillion Credits a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 439,478 Credits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.3 times as much as the poorest.

Companies are literally blowing their competition out of the water, there is something rotten in the state of Zerni, cows stare longingly at the greener grass on the other side of the fence, and blood isn't quite as thick as it used to be. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Zerni's national animal is the silver lynx, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is shinto.

Zerni is ranked 800^th in the world and 1^st in Zernxi Sector for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring 11,479 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.