The Triarchic Matriarchy of Vanilla Ninja is a huge, orderly nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-working, cynical population of 783 million Vanilla Ninjans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of La Comelia. The average income tax rate is 19.9%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Vanilla Ninjan economy, worth 59.1 trillion icecreams a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Information Technology. Average income is 75,471 icecreams, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

The people consider response to rudeness to be an acceptable casus belli, old folks reminisce about the last time someone was acquitted of a crime, one of the nation's leading exports is empty platitudes, and binoculars sales are at an all-time high. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Vanilla Ninja's national animal is the tiger, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Vanilla Ninja is ranked 147,963^rd in the world and 70^th in Albastru for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring 1,569.89 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.