The Colony of Lycom is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Governor with an iron fist, and notable for its pith helmet sales, national health service, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 4.113 billion Lycomians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mav'i City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 76.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Lycomian economy, worth a remarkable 1,180 trillion Koins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 287,035 Koins, with the richest citizens earning 6.6 times as much as the poorest.

Governor often plays real life games of Tower Defense against hordes of angry villagers, diplomatic fallout tends to be much more dangerous than radioactive fallout, citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns, and anti-riot police are dispatched whenever two elderly ladies gather to complain that prices have increased. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Lycom's national animal is the Alligator, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Individualism.

Lycom is ranked 281,021^st in the world and 327^th in Conch Kingdom for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -13.78 on the Clooney Contribution Index.