The Zoo of Simone Republic is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Simone with an even hand, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, public floggings, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 11.708 billion Simonians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small, corrupt, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mona. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 14.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Simonian economy, worth a remarkable 4,836 trillion Mones a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Retail, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an amazing 413,109 Mones, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,120,489 per year while the poor average 44,074, a ratio of 48.1 to 1.

Praying before a battle is a court-martial offence, the nation's industries are scrambling to switch to biodegradable plastics, Salmon is one of the most popular forenames in Simone Republic, and motorcycle riders are required to wear so much gear they've been nicknamed "Stay Pufts". Crime is totally unknown. Simone Republic's national animal is the Salmon, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is God.

Simone Republic is ranked 315,903^rd in the world and 5,995^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -1117.52 on the Scary Big Number Scale.